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Remember When Donald Trump Got Booed For Butchering "Take Me Out To The Ballgame”?
The day: July 9, 2000. The place: Wrigley Field. A young, 54-year-old fake billionaire with wild aspirations had been practicing singing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” for two full weeks in preparation
Andrew Bogut Dunked On, This Time On Twitter
Dallas Mavericks and former Golden State Warriors center Andrew Bogut’s political beliefs are exactly what you would expect them to be. He complains about the rappers, cars, and the bling bling in the
Can Donald Trump Grow A Beard? An Investigation
Donald Trump’s sense of self-worth seems to be based entirely on his status as an alpha male. He’s obscenely competitive, feels entitled to women, and is apparently fixated on the size of his dick.
Bobby Bowden Rambled For A Few Minutes At A Trump Rally Tonight
Legendary former FSU football coach Bobby Bowden spoke at a rally for Donald Trump this evening in Tampa. He mostly talked about the importance of having a strong military, and asked the crowd “Aren’t
An Ode To James Carville's Super Fucked-Up Glasses
This election has turned the country into a tar pit from which we will never escape, but it did give us one thing that has brought me great joy. That thing is political pundit James Carville’s
Wikileaks: Clinton Campaign Considered Having Her Make A "Yo Mama" Joke
Here’s a good one from the Clinton email leaks. Before a February campaign event in Birmingham, Al., a Hillary Clinton campaign staffer wrote a “Yo mama” joke into the speech, one which was eventually
Is Eric Trump A Lemonade Thief?
The latest scandal out of Donald Trump’s campaign: Possible lemonade theft. It appears that Eric Trump, one of his five children, put lemonade in a water cup at an In-N-Out burger, which the
Donald Trump's Donation Ticker Is Actually Just A Sample File On Loop
Take a trip over to DonaldJTrump.com, and you’ll be greeted by the nice, prominent donation ticker you see above. The implication, of course, is that all these people have just added their name to
This Was The Only Good Part Of Tonight's Debate
In a brief battle over exactly how much Donald Trump loves Vladimir Putin (is it just a lot or more than he loves his own children?), Trump offered the most infantile, absolutely incredible retort of
Kill The "Spin Room"
You know the “spin room”: it’s the place where, at the conclusion of a debate, a horde of reporters and campaign employees/hangers-on gather en masse to chatter cheerfully about the ghastly horrors
Donald Trump Won't Say If He’ll Accept The Results Of The Election If He Loses
Barring some monumental fuckup on the part of the Clinton campaign, Donald Trump will not be the next president of the United States. Over the past few months, he has repeatedly fed the notion that if
Donald Trump On Sexual Assault Accusations: "I Don’t Know Those People"
About two-thirds of the way into tonight’s debate, Chris Wallace finally brought up the many sexual assault allegations against Donald Trump that have been cropping up over the past week. Trump’s
Liveblogging The Last Presidential Debate Please God
Twenty-six debates. After tonight, we will have suffered a total of 26 presidential and primary debates. I truly thought we’d be all be dead by now. Read more...
BuzzFeed CEO: Ivanka Trump Told Me She Wanted To See "Mulatto Cock" [UPDATE]
BuzzFeed CEO Jonah Peretti decided to share a little insight into Ivanka Trump’s capacity for lewdness on Twitter earlier today. According to Peretti, Ivanka is particularly interested in seeing “a
Donald Trump Prepares For Tonight's Debate
At this point, it’s common knowledge that Donald Trump isn’t exactly one for studying, but even the Donald has to prepare a little. Which is why now, for the first time ever, we’re giving you an
The Election Is Done, By The Way
Here’s how this debate is going to go: Read more...
DNC Apologizes For Illegally Dumping A Bunch Of Poop Down A Storm Drain
A DNC bus was apparently so full of shit this morning that it pulled over in Lawrenceville, Ga. and illegally dumped a bunch of it down a storm drain. Witnesses complained of a “foul smell” and
It Was A Nice Day In New York Today
Earlier today, local news station NY1 stumbled upon a “mysterious” statue of a mostly naked Hillary Clinton “depicted with horse hooves, and standing on what appeared to be printouts of emails. The
Remember When Donald Trump Called Condoleezza Rice A Bitch?
No one respects women more than noted pussy-grabber Donald Trump. This, according to Trump, is indisputable. Which is why it may shock you to learn that, back in 2006, in a speech made to thousands,