Beer is very useful. In just the past few days I have relied on beer to help me relate to my fellow man, to make college basketball interesting, and to wean me off my Tylenol PM addiction. Beer can also be used to liven up an otherwise limp pot of whatever-bean chili, to repair a dicey relationship with your mail carrier, or to flaunt your twin triumphs over gluten and sobriety. Beer is also quite often delicious. This is why beer is the best, and as such ought not be fucked with.