Perry Announces Resignation With Video Called ‘The Coolest Job I Ever Had’

Photo of Perry Announces Resignation With Video Called ‘The Coolest Job I Ever Had’
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Energy Secretary Rick Perry debuted a saccharine video announcing his impending retirement Thursday, entitled “The Coolest Job I Ever Had.”

Set to a score not unlike that of sad animal adoption commercials, shots of Perry in slow motion and fuzzy focus chase each other across the screen.

With a wry chuckle he recalls: “You know, from my first day on the job in March of 2017, you welcomed me with open arms, even though you probably didn’t know what to expect from this born-and-bred Texan who’d just arrived in Washington D.C.”

Cue shots of Perry strolling around in a department windbreaker, gazing intently at various and sundry equipment.

“You know, some people wake up every day and wonder if they’re making a difference,” he says. “The men and women who work at this department do not have to worry about that. You are literally changing the world.”

“So it’s with profound emotion and gratitude that I’m announcing my resignation effective later this year as your Energy Secretary,” he adds. “And then I’ll return to my favorite place in the world: Texas.”

“I thank President Trump for giving me the opportunity of a lifetime,” he concludes. “I’m so glad that I said yes,” he adds like a blushing bride.

Not mentioned in the four-plus minute video? Perry’s involvement in the Ukrainian scandal, which has come into clearer focus with the testimony of people like George Kent, deputy assistant secretary of state responsible for Ukraine, this week.

Kent told House investigators that he was told to stay away from Ukrainian policy, and to focus on other countries in his portfolio instead. He said that acting White House Chief of Staff Mick Mulvaney told him to pass off any Ukrainian-related work to the “three amigos” helming that nation’s relations: Perry, U.S. Ambassador to the EU Gordon Sondland and special U.S. envoy to Ukraine Kurt Volker.

Perry led the U.S. delegation to Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky’s inauguration back in May, and, per the whistleblower’s complaint, made it clear to Zelensky that Trump would withhold military aid until he could assess how pliant the new President would be to his demands.

Upon his return, Perry urged Trump to meet with Zelensky, only to met with a sharp retort that Perry speak with Rudy Giuliani to better understand Trump’s qualms about connecting with Zelensky. Giuliani confirmed that such a conversation between him and Perry did take place.

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